What to hide in your apartment before you bring in a one-night stand

What to hide in your apartment before you bring in a one night standGuys apartments are a thing of strange beauty. You have to be a man to really understand the way our decorating and organizational skills work. Basically, we have none. Even the tidiest of us all have the occasional brain farts and forget to woman proof the pad before going out on the town. Because who knows who you might bring home? The truth is there are just a few things that we really need to put away before we have a romantic partner over for a one night NSA sexy night.

Your Dirty Underwear

In fact, all your dirty clothes should be off the floor, bed and furniture. It should be placed out of site into some sort of receptacle. Even your clean underwear should be tucked safely away. You really don’t want that little squirt you couldn’t get wiped away to be on full display when the two of you come tumbling and fumbling into the bedroom after last call, do you? Enough said.

Pubic Hair and Other Such Foul Trimmings

One thing that will turn a woman off quicker than a booger in your mustache is a pile of pubes in the sink, in the toilet or in the tub. If you’re going out for the night, and you’re just hoping to get laid, clean your bathroom. It’s well worth the hour or less it takes to clean up after yourself and take care of the hair, and nail trimmings strewn about the room.


Pornography

This topic includes magazines, films, DVDs, GIFs and any other type of porn you may have lying around the house. Click Here to learn how to hide your porn like a boss. Not only that but any type of photos you have around of other women such as old girlfriends, wives, lovers or even relatives looking hot. Hide these items well. You don’t want them falling out of the top shelf of the closet or sliding out from under the bed. Some women claim it doesn’t bother them but don’t take the chance. It will probably gross her out or make her uncomfortable at the very least.

Social Media Posts

Make sure to make everything private that may be embarrassing and not to have any photos public but those of your immediate family and pets. Learn how to make your Facebook profile private here. You can be sure any new woman you hook up with will be checking you out online in the ladies’ room before you ever get her home from the club.

Pets

If you have a really rambunctious dog or an overly friendly cat, you may want to have a pet sitter or a room just for the pet. Not everyone likes animals, especially not while in the throes of passion. Have you ever tried to hook up while a dog sat on the floor staring up at your every move? It’s not easy. Another tactic here is to hide the litter box. This is only necessary if you have your litter box in a place that is very visible. You don’t want a stinky, overflowing litterbox in the bathroom, kitchen or bedroom. The smell alone could run off your date prospect.

Valuables

We don’t always make the right decisions when it comes to getting laid. Sometimes, especially if alcohol is involved, we make a choice we regret later down the road. Often that choice includes bringing home a woman with sticky fingers. In other words, a thief. She may find a gold chain or pile of bills thrown on the dresser valet. Perhaps it’s an expensive watch or piece of jewelry you forgot you left lying there. We all make mistakes. Make sure to put away all your valuables before you bring home someone you aren’t sure of. A pretty face doesn’t always translate to a pretty heart.

Anything Pertaining to Previous Relationships

Not just photos, guys. I’m talking panties, letters, anything with her handwriting on it, no screensavers or wall paper. Nothing. Don’t have anything in plain sight that eludes to another woman in your heart. If you forget to put something away just say it’s your sister or your cousin. You know the drill.

The main thing to remember about your home when you may or may not have NSA sex on the horizon is to do a quick run through and clean up the basics. It doesn’t have to be a thorough cleaning but it does have to hit the hotspots rather well. Make sure that nothing gross or unhealthy is lurking around. Spot check the refrigerator for anything that doesn’t belong in there and throw out anything with live being growing on it. Spray some air freshener and you should be good to go. It doesn’t have to be perfect but we want to shoot for something better than a college dorm room.